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WHO TO CALL FIRST Whether
you received a 2 a.m. phone call with news of an unexpected death or
shared your loved one's final moments of a long illness, your initial
reaction to the death was likely shock. It doesn't seem to matter how
prepared we are - or aren't - a loved one's death often leaves us
feeling numb and bewildered. If you're responsible for making the
funeral arrangements or executing the will, shock and grief can be
immobilizing. Even simple decisions can be overwhelming.
Making the first phone calls
What
to do first depends on the circumstances of the death. When someone
dies in a hospital or similar care facility, the staff will usually
take care of some arrangements, such as contacting the funeral home you
choose, and if necessary, arranging an autopsy. You will need to notify
family, friends and clergy. It may be easier on you to make a few phone
calls to other relatives or friends and ask each of them to make a
phone call or two to specific people, so the burden of spreading the
news isn't all on you. If you are alone, ask someone to keep you
company while you make these calls and try to cope with the first hours
after the death.
Call a funeral director
Whatever
the circumstances of death, one of your first calls should be to a
licensed funeral director. We are here to help you:
- transport the body
- obtain a death certificate
- select a casket, urn and/or grave marker
- arrange the funeral, memorial and/or burial service
- prepare the obituary
- help you notify the deceased's employer, attorney, insurance company and banks
- offer grief support or direct you to other resources
Call the employer
If your loved one was working, you'll need to call his
or her employer immediately. Ask about the deceased's benefits and any
pay due, including vacation or sick time, disability income, etc. Ask
if you or other dependents are still eligible for benefit coverage
through the company. Ask whether there is a life insurance policy
through the employer, who the beneficiary is and how to file a claim.
Call the life insurance company
Look through the deceased's paperwork for the life
policy. Call the agent or the company and ask how to file a claim.
Usually the beneficiary (or the beneficiary's guardian, if a minor)
must complete the claim forms and related paperwork. You'll need to
submit the death certificate and a claimant's statement to establish
proof of claim. Remember to ask about payment options. You may have a
choice between receiving a lump sum or the having the insurance company
place the money in an interest-bearing account from which you can write
checks.
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